Let’s look at why you might feel guilty asking your partner to do more household and child care tasks!

Do you ever feel guilty when talking with your partner about sharing the household and childcare tasks?

Maybe you want something off your plate but feel guilty for asking him to take over.

You are tired of doing everything yet feel like you should be doing everything. You wonder why others seem to have their act together while you don’t.

I’m here to tell you that this isn’t guilt. This is societal conditioning telling you that, as a mom, you are responsible for everything at home.

But it’s not all on you. And you are not a failure. Society is failing you.

Our society is set up for an “ideal worker”—where one person (usually the husband) works to support the household, and another person (usually the wife) does everything else.

But that’s not how life works anymore. In most households, both parents work. And even if one person is home full-time, that doesn’t mean that person takes on everything.

Another part of this might be how we frame guilt.

I love how Dr. Becky from Good Inside talks about guilt:

✔️ Guilt = When we act in a way that doesn’t align with our values.
❌ “Not Guilt” = When we take on someone else’s discomfort or disappointment.

I’m guessing a lot of what you feel is “Not Guilt.”

Your husband is used to the status quo. And now you’re asking him to step up more at home.

💭 Maybe he’s not happy about it.
💭 Maybe he wants to help but isn’t sure how.

Whatever he is feeling, you are not responsible for those feelings.

✅ Yes, you can communicate in a way that feels good for both of you.
✅ Yes, you can support him in stepping up at home, in a way that makes sense for your family.

But you are NOT responsible for his feelings.

This is where good boundaries come in.

I work on boundaries with my clients.

If you’re ready to stop feeling guilty about asking your husband to do more at home, let’s talk.

Sign up for my Share The Load calls today!