In the last 2 weeks, I’ve asked you to clarify what you want this season to look like and document all your to-dos and commitments. Now, it’s time for some concrete action with that information. It’s time to evaluate what’s going on. I’m guessing that it all feels important.
You’ve said yes to all of these activities and don’t want to let anyone down. You don’t want your kids to miss out on anything that helps set them up for success later or to feel left out. Plus, that networking event could be important for your business.
And I get that. You want your kids to commit to a soccer season. You joined the PTA because that’s what good moms do, and you’d feel guilty if you stopped showing up to meetings.
Not to mention all the tasks that keep the household functioning, like buying groceries, doing laundry, and finding that permission slip for a field trip. And your daughter’s birthday is coming up, and that needs to be magical. Plus, keeping your business running through all of this.It’s a lot, and it feels like it all needs to happen right now.
However, when we know what’s important to us in this season, we can take a critical look at how we’re spending our time. This is where we get into the nitty-gritty of how you’re spending your time compared to what you want life to look like in this season. This guides what tasks and commitments end up on our list. Today, this week, and for the next few months.
When we don’t clarify what’s important, we end up spending our time in ways that we come to resent. We’re doing things out of obligation, not values.
We’re signing our kids up for too many activities, throwing elaborate birthday parties, and saying yes to too many things. We might overcommit ourselves by volunteering to be the class parent and the parent who organizes snacks for the baseball team. Even when we don’t want to spend the time planning and organizing the class parties or reminding other parents it’s their turn to bring a snack. Or doing both at the same time.
But when we focus on what’s important to us, our task list feels a tiny bit less overwhelming. We can keep up with everything because we’re not feeling resentful about it. Ok, I can’t promise you’ll never feel resentful about cleaning the bathroom, but we can make some of it better.
If it all feels important, then find a coach to help you work through some of this. Like working with me.
Here’s what I recommend you do next. Take your description of how you want this season to feel, and compare it to the list you created of your commitments and to-dos.
Are there tasks that you can cross off because they don’t make sense in this season? It doesn’t mean you can’t come back to something down the road. It’s ok to have a someday list that you check once a month or once a quarter. Or to assign tasks to a month when you know that you might have a bit more space in your life.
Review your commitments and see what is and isn’t working for you. You might not be able to quit something right now, but can you say no next time? Or maybe there’s something you love doing and want to keep doing. That’s great information. Awareness of where things might be out of balance is important and is a great first step. Then, we can work on how to make changes going forward.
Let’s look at the example from last week. At this point, you’re committed to the PTA event and your kids are committed to both of their sports. So maybe you consider doing something simpler for the holiday this year. Maybe it’s hosting a potluck instead of spending all morning cooking. And you make a note that next year you’re going to sign up for a different PTA position so you’re not as busy in the Fall.
Maybe you love being busy. Maybe everything on your list fits right into what you want this season to look like. In that case, we can talk about how to make sure you’re getting the right things done so you don’t wear yourself out in the process of keeping on top of everything.
You might not be able to make major changes right now. Being aware of what’s working and what’s not is a great first step.
What was surprising? What do you want to do differently going forward, if anything? Head over to my IG and send me a message. I’d love to hear what you think!
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